Life 02/21/11

What can I say, Life just seems to be naturally hectic with me. Im currently trying to print out my anatomy homework for this week all the while typing this here blog. I decided that using my husbands cousins computer to do all this would be better then going to the computer lab at the school, but watching the flimsy desk shift and sway back and forth due to the weird motion the printer is making is, by no means is not entertaining, is a little troublesome. I have spent this whole holiday weekend trying to make up for what I lagged behind in for not only school but for home as well. I finally got the chance to go to lunch with my dad and talk about things that concern my brother and sister. I was able to give my children some way overdue attention. I just cant seem to quit picking little arguements with my husband. I guess the stress has finally settled in, or the bi-polar side of me is coming out, and he is the only adult around that I can gripe and complain to and about. Does that make me a shitty person? I hope not, I have been busting my hump trying to get everything back on track with our marriage since we reconciled 8 months ago. I would never want to go back to that point in my life, the whole year my husband and I were split was pure hell for me for some reason. We split up because I felt that he was taking me for granted but what the hard part now is is the fact that he doesnt seem to have changed his behavior at all. I want to show him that I care, for example, he came to me last night and told me that he was urinating blood, I thought I was showing him that I cared for him by saying that we should go to the emergency room right away, but he seemed to be more annoyed by my presence then anything else. Is it possible tojuggle school, three kids, and a whole hell ton of shit at home and still try to put your heart and soul into making a marriage work? I hope so because I will die trying. Forever opitmistic.....